Monday, February 07, 2005

Dream Life...Not

In honor of Pam, who had a frigging PIPE SAW going in her house today. Why, you ask? Oh, just so her radiators could be repaired. You know, those things that provide HEAT. Did I mention she lives in Austria? Did I mention that they had so much freakin' snow last week that...well, you'd have to see for yourself. (Check her slide show from last week's posts.) But, it's COLD. And here I sit in my flannel jammies and it's still in the low 70's. (Wimp.)

See that post below? The one that's all 'Oh, let's be spiritual' and crap. Know what I really wanted to post yesterday? This was what I originally wrote:

Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change
the courage to change the things I can
and the patience to not go up to the 3rd floor and kill those motherfuckers who won't stop with the pounding and drilling. I mean, really. Do they NOT understand that this building is made out of concrete? Do they have any idea how frigging LOUD that shit sounds? And besides, it's Sunday, for God' sake.
Thanks. Amen.

So lest anyone think that splitting your time between Austria and Seattle (Pam) or lolling around the lazy Virgin Islands (me) is all just a hunky-dory dream life, let me just say: um, not.

Just when I think I couldn't possibly hear a story that would top all of the other stories I've heard here about government corruption and ineptitude, along comes another doozy. Last week the attorney in our office had two deeds that she needed to have attested. The (ONE-PERSON) office that handles that service recently instituted "expedited service" for an additional $100 fee per document--"expedited" being defined as 24-hour turnaround. She dropped off the documents at 10 am on Thursday, along with payment of the appropriate fees, including an extra $200 (for her two documents) for "expedited 24-hour" service. She went back at 4:00 on Friday to pick them up--30 hours later. She saw the ONE PERSON who works in that department standing in a hallway, chatting up some coworkers. This woman is notoriously ill-tempered and rude and literally does almost nothing, even though the government has employed her for god knows how long. When she saw the attorney, the worker gave her a disgusted look and asked what she wanted. The attorney replied that she was there to pick up her "expedited service" documents. The government worker sucked her teeth in disgust (as only West Indians can do) and said (imagine a thick West Indian accent here), "They only 8 hours in a workday! Twenty-four hours! Three days!" Let me repeat that: 24 hour service = 3 (8-hour) workdays. The attorney went to the woman's supervisor and had her documents 15 minutes later (after explaining what had transpired). But 24 HOUR SERVICE EQUALS THREE WORKDAYS!

I'm familiar with "island time," but come on!


Blogger Katherine said...

that's hysterical! I wonder how many people she sucked in with that 3-day logic . . . and my hackles rose just listening to your description of her . . . wadda witch :) K

8:17 PM  
Blogger Pam said...

I knew that somewhere in all the stuff you hear about the power of prayer there was some truth, I just did not realize the prayer could contain language about granting me the patience not to "kill those m*f*ers." I was just going about it all wrong!

This morning, he starts at 7am. What kind of contractor at 7am?! (Sigh.) Two left, he should be done by noon.

2:14 AM  

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