Tuesday, November 16, 2004

The Magic of Humility

Ever had one of those moments when you get a glimpse of an opportunity--a possibility, perhaps--as if a window has suddenly been pried open just a bit to shed a little light? Only to find it quickly followed by a fortuitous little event...a phone call or letter or email or casual encounter or introduction or...whatever? And it makes you smile, inwardly and outwardly, as if "the universe" (or fate or destiny or God or whatever it is at work) has just waved its wand over you and you wonder if, in fact, something good is about to happen?

I really do believe that "the universe" (or whatever it is) supports one's dreams--much more than we believe on a day-to-day basis. But even more specific (to my life anyway!), I believe that our decisiveness is supported. That if we simply make a decision--rather than hemming and hawing and straddling that goddamn fence--events will begin to fall into place. We could stand immobile at a crossroads for months, years....hell, decades. But once we choose a fork in the road--once we commit to heading in a specific direction--doors seem to open almost effortlessly.

The boyfriend and I had one of those moments yesterday. We had a conversation in the car late Sunday afternoon. It involved a decision, jointly reached and agreed to. It involved change. And once we made that decision--and felt good about it!--it seemed almost logical when the phone rang yesterday and handed him an opportunity for some nice short-term possibilities.

I know this is vague, and I apologize for that. But I need to be a little vague until we're ready to make public what our plans are. It's nothing earth-shattering, and yet it feels quite big in the moment because of the amount of change involved. It's one of those quirky things where the slightest shift in game plan can have large ramifications. One little ripple....

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We saw "Ray" last night. We both loved it. I thought Jamie Foxx was astonishing. And I say that as someone who's almost always disappointed with everything in life. I know that sounds cynical, but it's not really. It's just that I learned decades ago that I tend to have sort of distorted expectations, so I'm often...well, not exactly disappointed...but sort of sad that things I expected to be blown away by turn out to just be, I don't know, nice instead. But this was one instance where in spite of all of the previews and reviews and interviews and hype, I wasn't disappointed. I didn't think it was necessarily an excellent film--good, but not excellent. But there were some fabulous performances and, for me, Jamie Foxxx inhabited that character in the best sense of the word.

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Boyfriend's at a resort playing a gig tonight. So I put on my flannel jammies (even though it's still in the upper 70's...brrrrr), made a bowl of popcorn and sat down to watch "Oprah." Tonight's show was about a dream wedding she gave to a viewer couple. It was at the Hotel Bel-Air in L.A. and as the bride made her entrance, Chris Botti played the wedding march. I made a mental note to mention it to the boyfriend, a la "Oh, saw Chris Botti on Oprah's Dream Wedding show." But then they showed Oprah introducing Chris at the reception where his band played during dinner. And THEN, she closed the show by having him perform in the studio and raving how she'd just discovered him and ran out and bought all of his CD's.

When H. was here, we were in the car one day and I don't remember how we got to this, but I said to him from the backseat, "Your Dad doesn't care about being famous." H. was in the passenger seat and quickly turned to look at his Dad and asked sort of incredulously, "Dad, you don't? You don't care about being famous?" "No, son, I really don't. It (music) was never about that for me." Which means when he sees his old pals on Oprah or touring with Sting or Wynton Marsalis or directing an Oscar-nominated film or showing up unexpectedly on screen when we're in a movie theatre, well, he just smiles and says, "Cool." But honest to God, I don't think he ever thinks, "Why not me?" And that's one of the biggest reasons I love him the way I do.

2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

A)-- can't WAIT to hear what the secret decisons are!
B)--- will go see Ray asap.
C)-- The Boyfriend is one cool dude.

~bluepoppy

10:41 PM  
Blogger Katherine said...

I agree with BP . . . and I look so forward to meeting you some day my friend :) . . . that was a lovely, lovely post . . . :) K

12:40 AM  

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